School days.

My high school days were the best

I was being called ugly by a fake Facebook account when all I did was dancing on the stage with fav pretty girls of the school.

I was sexually harassed by the guys who bought their underwear using their parents' money.

I got insecure by the clothes I wore, wondering if its too revealing.

I climbed up stairs looking down, not because I'm afraid of the steep stairs, but to make sure that my “kain sekolah” didn't reveal my true skin tone.

Every time I walk to the classroom, I prayed so hard that no one 'dajjal' my table, locker and books. 

But, Allah knows to give me the best out of those pains.

These girls were there when I couldn't even tell my parents that a fake Facebook account keep saying "kau buruk" to their eldest daughter. They were there to tell me how my braveness and confident brings out beauty in me. 

They were there when those boys who bought cigarettes using their pocket money from their parents, dajjal my table and school books by drawing a sensitive part of the body of a growing lady by embracing me in their hugs and sometimes, cry with me.

But, I wasn’t the only one struggling. They were too. Regardless their very own struggle, they helped me out when sometimes they needed help for themselves. And I realized that we have each other.

And that’s why, high school days were the best.

Admit that I regret every second I choose to go dating rather than spending time with them.

And I kinda miss us, GD.

Passion or money

“Kau jaga anak syurga weh”

Speechless. Am I really sincere in helping them? I always remind myself not to be “hamba duit”. To always remember that experience is all I need and to enjoy every single day. But then, my best friend said this to me. Then only I realized. Oh yes they are. Then I start to put myself in their family’s shoes. Pity them. I have to handle their behavior for only 3 hours but their family is dealing with it forever. 

I accidentally push my student out of anger because he headbutt me. Right after I pushed him, I feel guilty because he seems surprised. Now, I miss him. 

190312

 Path.  

We took an opposite paths, one to the left and another to the right. The more we move, the longer the distance between us.

But the world is round. Encounter is possible.

-D-

Thank you 2018

I consider every year as a very different chapter but 2018 is definitely one of the best ( the most hectic and chaotic, hahahah lol) This is where I spend my final semester on thesis writing. I struggled for the whole 6 semesters not to have any C in my transcript and ended up having one C+ on the very final semester on a continuous assessment project. I'm doomed. Luckily, I graduated on time. Yeay!

After internship, I get a job (alhamdulillah) easily but this ungrateful lady is so busy chasing her dream job which makes her lost both. While working, I receive another offer which is super related to my degree so I submitted my resignation letter. Turn out, the new place doesn't fit me. What they told during interview and written in the contract is contradict but to make things short, they didn't tell me that it was going to be shift hours! As a fully depended public transportation user, I find it very inconvenient. So I ended up having to go through from A to Z again in job hunting. But its okay, I know it happens for a reason.

Lets pray for another amazing journey in 2019 and may I find you (kerja) and not to miss, you too (jodoh ehem where you at?! hahahaha) this year.